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Quality
of life
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"My
focus is on how to live well in the days I have left.
They may be many, they may be few. But knowing what’s
important to me helps me live fully now."
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When faced with a serious illness,
one is often called upon to evaluate core values and beliefs:
What makes life worth living? Are there elements you are unwilling to live without?
The key to living well with dying
is to identify what it is that you value most about your physical,
mental, and spiritual well being. Should your family need to make decisions for
you, it will help them to know about your values. Even if life-sustaining procedures
are not an issue, clarifying what it is you cherish about life will enable you
to focus on those qualities in the time you have remaining. Some questions to
consider are: |
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- Which symptoms bother you the most? Perhaps they can
be managed more effectively.
- What favored activities have been limited by your illness?
Perhaps adjustments can be made so you can capture the qualities
of those activities even if you are not able to perform
them as you did in the past.
- How have relations with your friends and family changed
because of your illness? Perhaps talking about it could
clear the air for closer interactions.
- What are your worries, fears, or concerns? Rather than
bottle them up inside, who can you speak to about them?
Who is a good listener? Who has the resources to help you
come to a greater understanding about your concerns?
- What does your spiritual path offer in terms of support
and ritual to help you through these times? Perhaps there
are people you can call upon to help you access this support.
- What gives your life purpose? Perhaps you would find
it useful to reflect on the
meaning of your life so far, identify your achievements,
and acknowledge your shortcomings.
- What gives you hope
at this time in your life? The dying have wishes for the
future, too. Perhaps you can think about your hopes and
what tasks remain before you to complete your life in a
positive way.
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Obviously, each of us must answer
these questions for ourselves. At rock bottom, what is the
minimum quality of physical comfort, functional ability, social interaction,
emotional peace, spiritual support, and existential satisfaction
that would still make your life worth living? If you were not able to speak for
yourself, are there circumstances in which the quality of life would be so low
that it would be worse than dying?
Share your answers with your caregivers
to clarify your values and your priorities. If you can translate
these values into an advance directive,
you will be doing them a great service. You will spare the people
who love you the angst of guessing your wishes if they are faced
with having to make decisions about life support. Knowing what
you cherish most about life will also help ensure that the quality
of your days is as rich as possible. |
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This website is sponsored by Lower Valley Hospice and Palliative Care, providing compassionate care and support
to the seriously ill and their families since 1978. |
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